Oh Christmas Tree

We got a tree. It was like some National Lampoon shit.

Yes I said shit in a Christmas tree post.

I was prepared this year.  Or so I thought.  So I pulled out the bin of decorations (yes just the one) and did some inventory.  Downloaded a Cartwheel coupon.  Headed to Target.

In our apartment move, we must have gotten rid of the Christmas tree base.  So we got another base.  New ornaments.  An Anna stocking for Addy.  Wrapping paper. And headed to Kroger for groceries and a tree. We made sure we opened up the doors for the guys to tie it to the roof, because a year or two ago the guys tied to tree to where we had to cut ourselves out of the car.  We were intertwined.

<hits high hat>

Right.  Tree loaded.  Take it upstairs. Put it in the base. Doesn’t fit.  Lay it down. Get a dinky kitchen knife. Saw branches and not fingers.  Doesn’t fit.

Target.  Another base. (no treble).

No fit.

We hacked the tree to shit.  Dismantled the base.  Still didn’t fit.  Threw the tree out.

Back to Kroger.  Another tree ATTACHED TO BASE.

When I get home with the second tree, Addy was up from her late nap and was like “oh hey look a tree.”

And I’m like “oh yay now you can decorate the tree! we got you an Ariel ornament and colorful balls and stuff.”

Except she saw my phone and wanted to play Minion Rush.

Then she was like “oh ok I’ll put it” and I was too exhausted to even do anything else with it.  Last year we got her a tabletop battery powered LED tree for her room and she found that in the box and decided that was better instead.

And that’s how the Christmas tree debacle went.

No treble.

However, this has not sullied my Christmas spirit.  I finally got the leg lamp ornament from A Christmas Story.  We’re going to the Chilrdren’s Musem member’s party.  We’re going to the Zoo Lights deal.  And I plan to drive all through neighborhoods to see Christmas lights. And eventually I will mail out Christmas cards.